Who do you want to be?
How do we become who we dream of?
It seems like every entrepreneur talks about this whole manifest your dreams…. and how it helps you reach your desired goals.
(Of course, I’m skeptical)
So how do we do it? Especially since we don’t all have equal access to resources.
We all have aspiring goals and envision ourselves differently than what we currently are. For example, I am superhero who uses the clarinet to save lives and bring joy and some how magically I make money doing that. However, reality just isn’t that simple. So how do we build our lives up to live the best life possible? Well, I have some thoughts regarding this.
How many of us have heard this: You must manifest your destiny.
Manifest who you want...uhmmm okay? Sounds like some mysterious method that no one really knows, right? You can google it and you will get a variety of answers. No thanks, just give it to me straight.
I think this is kinda gimmicky, perhaps someone in the corporate sphere came up with this to sell more products and workshops?
However, I do have some ideas on how to have a stronger mindset that allows you to focus, see life beyond your circumstance and discern when and how to move forward. A lot of change requires finding the right community and people to produce the environment necessary to evolve. Being surrounded by the right support networks will provide the resources you don’t readily have.
But before I get to that, I have to acknowledge the state of reality that we live in. There’s also the issue of unequal distribution of resources. It’s not easy when you don’t have access to mentors or resources like a steady income or support for projects. As a performing artist, I hear a lot about people doing projects, doing gigs and even traveling. But when I look into it deeper the gigs are not always high paying or, even worse, the projects they are doing are for art’s sake and they’re not even getting paid - where’s the impact in that? By the way, nothing wrong with art for art’s sake but if you’re not even getting paid and it’s not benefiting others…well what’s the point? Some people do this because they don’t want to lose their identity as an artist. This is the wrong of going about it.
So how do we make sure we are being valued and continuing to grow? Here are my thoughts, let’s dig in and I hope you will get some ideas on how to focus on a trajectory that you desire in a practical manner.
Disclaimer: pursuing the goal of being your best authentic self is not easy and it’s not a straight journey. Be prepared to do some soul searching, try many things, and have lots of patience.
1) Assess your environment and curate it.
It’s super important that we figure out what our current state is, this means knowing what is working for you and not and why. This is also an ongoing process that evolves in time.
For example, some performing artists feel that they need to be in a big city (like NYC) in order to get access to what they need to excel, network and make connections to create the career they want. Other people, might want to change their network and feel that they are being stifled by the people that are surrounding them and need to find different people to reach out to in their field or interest. Whatever it might be, you need to ask yourself questions and figure out what you want. This will be one of the key factors of who you want to evolve into.
The important thing is that you create the environment that you need to thrive. If you are currently unable to physically be there we have the internet to help. Social media can be an incredibly powerful tool to connect with other people that you share your like interests and most likely you will find people who are also in the same vocation.
Facebook has pretty good groups that you can join. LinkedIn is a good platform for meeting professionals in your area or those who have careers that you are interested in. You need to develop relationships and networks that will allow you to reach new levels and this can be a great start. However, this does take time. You also need to do some research on events and people and have the courage to meet people and go to these events. If you are able to establish a network online perhaps do a meet-up so you can learn more about this network and see how you can nurture it.
2) Research the competition and network with them.
Yes, your competition is also your best allies in connecting with the industry and work. Some of you might not want to hear that, I’m keeping it real with ya’ll. People need people, yes this includes you and your competition.
If they are not able to do an assignment they need to find someone who is qualified and trustworthy. If there is a gig that involves more than one person, for example, an orchestra job that needs two trumpets, that person who is your competition could recommend you. Consider this, if you yourself need coverage you will need the same thing as they do so make sure you’re okay. How can you serve people who are not only in your industry but also in your specific field and discipline? If you are someone who develops a reputation for being respectful, proficient and reliable that’s a huge win.
Researching others also gives you the opportunity to see other opportunities beyond your own spectrum. It’s not about copying others or wanting to be other people but what possibilities are out there can be helpful in figuring out who you want to be, what you want and also how you might want to approach your passion or industry.
Establishing relationships and friends, at least close acquaintances, can be really empowering because they most likely have experienced similar things you have as someone in the same industry and discipline but also in terms of finding work and them helping you. This will give you experiences that will shape how you see the industry and life, which can also influence who you want to aspire to be.
NOTE: See people as human beings first before you see them as competition.
3) Create a strong core
One of the things that will help you focus on how to become the person you want to be is discovering what those key elements are. This can really be life-changing because it acts as a guide of what to pursue and what to present to the public. Here’s the thing, you don’t have to have everything hashed out. Core means the main points not all of it, no one can know every single thing, so don’t’ worry.
Let me use myself as an example. I’m a classical musician who plays the clarinet and focuses on chamber music. That in itself is pretty niche. However, I am also fascinated with multidisciplinary performance and that allows me to open up a bit more. So the core is chamber music and if and when possible, I expand with other disciplines. So yes, that is niche but it is a guide for who I want to work with and it allows me to clearly articulate my needs as an artist and where to find opportunities.
4) Act on it
This is probably the most difficult part because who knows what that means or looks like. It looks different for everyone. This is part of the reason why people value mentors or people that look like them. Well here’s the truth. That can help but …it’s not 100% necessary. Don’t use those things as an excuse to not take action. Start small. So it might be that this week you have coffee with a work colleague to get to know them better and see if you can make a deeper connection. It might be that you first write down one of your goals and you research it and you join a Facebook group that reflects those goals. For others, it can be finding local or nearby events around your state or province. Just start. This will hopefully compound into other actions. Remember this is a journey and it’s called life.
These are just the first steps of becoming what you want to be. It takes time and experience. We will all change with our lived experiences.
Let’s embrace who we are and accept where we are. Acceptance is the first step to moving forward. Once you do that you will be able to explore the points I mentioned above.
Life is an adventure and you are the main character, be the person you want to be.
